This piece is important: the author asks many questions and raises many issues that people have about visiting graves. Please, be sure to read it.
” I never understood the draw of visiting the cemeteries where people you knew are buried. For years, before I ever lost anyone I really loved, I had the opinion that it was silly to visit a place where someone’s used up, decaying shell lay under the ground. Because I believe that our souls are eternal and they leave the body behind to go somewhere else when they die, I just thought it was one of those old-school, movie scene traditions that I would rarely, if ever, participate in. Another aspect of the grave-visiting issue is that, even 5 years after the fact, seldom does a single day pass without some triggered memory of my dad floating through my mind. Whether it is replaying the day he died, or just some little memory that involved my Dad in some way, I have never forgotten that he is gone, and, therefore, don’t feel like I need to visit his gravesite to remember him. But, I do it anyway. I still don’t know why, exactly, but I’ll drive the hour there, spend a bit of time hanging out, and then drive another hour back to Columbus. I don’t go expecting that I’ll have some experience that assures me of anything, or that makes me feel closer to him. I just go. And I take flowers so people will see that he was loved.”